| This website has been whipped out on me so many times that I felt a need to finally confront it. This type of site is a good example of a standard Christian tactic against skeptics: "BURY them in irrelevance!" When a skeptic asks a Christian for a single, good, scripture prophecy that would convince him; most often the Christian balks. Instead, the Christian would rather bury the skeptic in hundreds of light-weight, laughable, half-ass, no-substance fulfilled prophecies. A skeptic or questioning Christian is supposed to look at all these so-called fulfilled prophecies and say "Wow, one hundred sure seems like a lot of fulfilled prophecies, surely this must prove the validity of Judaism and Christianity." At first glance the quantity seems impressive but quantity without any level of quality is worthless as are these light-weight, laughable "prophecy fulfillments." |
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What would impress you?
This is a question that I often encounter while I'm pooh-poohing Christian fulfilled prophecy. The answer I usually give is "Probably whatever would impress you if it came from a different religion." Really, if a Zoroastrian came to you claiming that the founding of Iraq fulfilled some Zoroastrian prophecy of Persia - would you fall to your knees in belief or say "Well obviously, the Persians would establish their country... duh! Show me a detailed fulfilled prophecy!". Most so-called fulfilled prophecies are just as "duhhh" but piled together with twisted scriptures and two paragraphs of history, the prophecy sounds a lot smarter than it really is. What would actually impress me is not hundreds of super-generic, weak-ass "fulfilled prophecies" that can mean anything but a little word called "details". Prophets realized early on that when they made specific prophecies, they almost never came to pass so instead they would wax on poetically for paragraphs using glittering generalities and vivid imagery to create prophecies that sound mystical but really mean nothing. Had Isaiah accurately described the holocaust or Ezekiel given us a "heads-up" on Islam or Jesus maybe let Israel in on the Palestinian problem.... I might be impressed. Problem is; Judeo-Christian prophecies are either specific and unfulfilled, specific and written after the fact, seriously generic or fulfilled only in a twisted, bizarre rationalized way.
The "Duh Prophecy"
"Duh Prophecies" are generic reassurances meant to comfort people who are enduring a calamity. The prophecies are extremely generic and likely to come true sometime. As an example: Imagine that I want to make my own fulfilled "duh prophecies". I put on some sackcloth and wander around New Orleans after Hurricane Katrina preaching "New Orleans will be rebuilt.", "The people who have left will return.", "Crops will grow again in the fields." Etc. It could be that I'm just preaching some feel-goodisms that desperate people will "amen".
Maybe people will enjoy listening to these reassurances and I'll get some attention as a modern day prophet.
Chances are sometime in the future New Orleans will be rebuilt. After it gets rebuilt you know that people will return to it and surely if people are there, they'll plant what they used to plant. This is a serious duh! When it does come to pass can I claim fulfilled prophecy? Have I proven my stature as a prophet? Have I successfully proven my new religion? No. These are just "Duh prophecies" that may help the morale of the people at the time but prove nothing!.
The "GRAND Duh!"
The "Grand Duh!" is an extremely generic statement or pronouncement that is somehow appropriated as a prophecy. Usually the statement isn't even in a prophecy, it just happens to be so generic that it can be twisted into anything by a devotee. A psalm might say "God has saved me from destruction." and a Christian will appropriate this as a resurrection prophecy. Psalm 29:11 is shamelessly appropriated as a prophecy for the evangelism of the Gentiles by Christians: Let's read: "The LORD will give strength to His people; The LORD will bless His people with peace."
Prophecy After the Event
The prophecy was conveniently written down after the events took place. These types of "prophecies" are very common in the Bible including so-called prophecies of the Babylonian captivity or the prophecies found in the Gospels predicting the destruction of the temple of Jerusalem. These "prophecies" are written down after the event and are almost always a sort of priestly guilt-trip on the populace who would hear the "prophecy". "God said that you would be carried off by another country if you didn't listen to your priests!"
Mathematical Monstrosity
I've seen a couple of these monsters created to validate end-time or Messianic prophecies. Christians want to take a prophesied time period and then add a witch's brew worth of calculations in order to arrive at a pre-determined time necessary to fulfill a prophecy. In most of these cases Christians want to use some bizarre, mythological 360 day calendar. The actual Hebrew lunar calendar works on a nineteen year cycle: Twelve of those years are made up of twelve months (354 days) and seven of those years are made up of thirteen months (384 days). This works out to an average of 365 days a year so there is no reason not to interpret Biblical years as normal years. The Hebrew calendar is explained HERE.
Contrived Fulfillment
A prophecy should be fulfilled naturally, not artificially planned out by the potential fulfiller. As an example, let's say a prophecy in the Old Testament predicted the coming of a great prophet that will eat goat meat. You know that hordes of great-prophet-wannabes will be lining up at the butcher shop to buy goat meat. In the same way, Jesus and his disciples knew many of the Old Testament Messianic prophecies and were not at all shy about artificially fulfilling them. The best example is Jesus riding on a donkey in "fulfillment" of Zechariah 9:9.
Prophecy fragment
A prophecy fragment is a verse or even half of a verse yanked out of the middle of a scripture that often has nothing whatsoever to do with the subject. This is common among Jesus prophecies yet Christians will often choose irrationally to accept the misquote over the original prophecy. Examples include "..out of Egypt I have called my son" which is a statement of the nation of Israel ripped out of a non-prophecy. and "Rachel cries for her children" (supposedly for the slaughter of the innocents) which is really talking about the Babylonian captivity. Why can't the Gospel writers get away with this? Because if Matthew can rip a half verse out of a non-prophecy and apply it to Jesus then it follows that anyone can take the Bible apart into convenient half verses and start making up Messiah fulfillment for every half-baked Messah-wanna-be that comes along.
For example: Let's call me Matthew Jackson, fanatical devotee of a local cult leader.I write a book called "The Gospel of Frank according to Matthew Jackson." I write in Chapter 1:3 But Frank escaped from the bail-bondsman as it says in Mark 5:3 "could not be restrained, even with a chain."
A Christian looks at this and blanches!
"This isn't a full verse and neither did it have anything to do with a Messiah."
The Christian reads aloud the original text:
Mark 5
1 So they arrived at the other side of the lake, in the land of the Gerasenes. 2 Just as Jesus was climbing from the boat, a man possessed by an evil spirit ran out from a cemetery to meet him. 3 This man lived among the tombs and could not be restrained, even with a chain.
I'm actually upset that the Christian has read more than just half of one verse:
"Why did you add all those verses?" I ask "I was only refering to part of verse 3."
"Because you pulled a verse out of context and then misquoted it! This has NOTHING to do with a future messiah!"
"Oh no, just part of verse 3 does."
Neither Frank nor Matthew nor Luke are allowed to pull verses out of context and miquote them. You can't just scavenge half a verse out of a chapter-long prophecy (or NON-prophecy) misquote it and then try to make it apply to something that it obviously has nothing to do with! If you want to play that kind of ridiculous game than the entire Bible can be disassembled and used at will. Every cult-leader, sorcerer and reincarnated Jesus can fulfill thousands of so-called prophecies since you can interpret everything however the hell you want whenever the hell you want. Assyria means New Jersey. Statements by Paul about Timothy are really prophecies. "Desperate Housewives" can be found in the book Ezra! Ridiculous!
Stolen Prophecy:
In this case the full prophecy (or non-prophecy) is read and applied to something it never was meant to reference. Often the prophecy is mistranslated finding unique translations for words used differently everywhere else. The Prophecy's vague similarities are hailed as fulfillment while the many contradictions between the so-called prophecy and its fulfillment are rationalized or completely ignored. The similarities in a stolen prophecy are usually cosmetic while the important factors are ignored. Usually reading the entire Stolen Prophecy along with the surrounding texts will tell an unbiased reader what the prophecy or non-prophecy was really referencing. Christians commonly use prophecies for Jesus or Christians that were certainly meant for Israel.
Prophecy Collage:
Common Christian fallacy where Christians take hundreds of Prophecy Fragments and put them together to create an artificial cut and paste prophecy.
Disclaimer
One of the biggest problems I encountered in debunking 100prophecies.org is the fact that the website does not allow infidels to duplicate their material. This shows the confidence that Christians show in their own evidences and the level of censorship necessary to keep this fragile belief-system alive. I will reproduce only the following:
Realize that these verses are commonly appropriated as prophecies and the author really hasn't added much in the way of unique information.